The Fear of Traveling Alone & Helpful Tips for Overcoming It
Looking for a guide with practical tips that will help you conquer your fear of traveling alone? Then hop on and start reading!
In this post I included many things that I’ve used over the years when I traveled alone plus many others that I’ve learned from my other solo-traveling friends.
You’ll also find a section explaining why we’re afraid to travel alone as I think it’s super important to understand our fears before we jump on to try and work with them.
So let’s get started!
Quick Picks for Your Stay
Here are some of the main tips that I think are super important when you begin to travel alone:
- Taking baby steps
- Planning everything in advance
- Figuring out how you’re going to get around
Why are we afraid to travel alone?
Before we jump to ways in which you can cope with your fear of traveling alone, I think we should take a moment to understand as much as we can why we feel the way we do.
Although it manifest differently for everyone, at the root the fear of traveling alone comes down to:
- Not feeling safe in unfamiliar environments
- Feeling lonely (when you’re away from friends and family)
- Being an introvert (when the idea of socializing with strangers makes traveling alone scarier)
- Feeling overwhelmed by the responsibility (potentially missing flights, trains or tours, finding attractions in a new town, etc)
Practical tips for overcoming the fear of traveling alone
Now that we’ve seen some of the main reasons on why we’re afraid to travel alone, let’s see how we can work with our fear and not let it stop us from traveling and doing what we love!
Before that I want to point you to this post on universal fears from the Art of Anxiety blog where you can learn more about the 5 primal phobias that humans have. When it comes to traveling I found that the fear of ego-death, where you’re basically afraid of embarrassing yourself and the loss of autonomy, when we feel unable to do something causes us to be afraid, are the most common ones.
Of course there can be others, so definitely read that post as it can shed a lot of light on why you feel the way you do when traveling alone! I always say that the first step towards healing something is accepting that thing and understanding how it affects you.
Alright, now let’s start listing all the useful tips:
1. Take baby steps
I found this to be so helpful in all matters of life, when I want to do things that I’m scared of or that I haven’t done before.
Whenever I took baby steps towards something I noticed that with each thing that I accomplished towards my goal (no matter how small) I sent signals to my nervous system that I’m safe and that I can do this. Rather than setting impossible big goals that made me so scared and procrastinate.
The best way you can take baby steps is to do things that don’t feel as scary and that can prepare you for taking that trip you’ve been terrified but also so excited to take.
Here are some things you can do:
- Travel locally before going to a different country: this can look like going to a town in your country for a weekend, where you’ll know the language, culture and you’ll still be pretty close to your friends and family)
- Go on a road trip (if you drive): this can be so helpful as you’ll get a taste of that freedom of just being on the open road, traveling to a new place! It will be so exciting and at the same time, it’ll give you some edge as you’ll be alone
- Start with short holidays: before you plan to stay a whole month in a new country, travel there for a weekend, or just a few days. See how you feel and imagine that you’re actually staying there for a few weeks. This can be a super helpful exercise.
2. Plan everything in advance
I think this applies to all trips but especially when we’re traveling along. Planning in advance can take away some of the anxiety and fear, as you’ll know exactly where you’re going, staying, what you’re doing and that always creates a feeling of safety.
Here are some of the things you can plan and to in advance:
- Do some research on the location, read travel blogs and ask questions on Reddit or read other forums
- Book your accommodation, plane tickets and attractions/tours tickets
- Make a rough itinerary of activities, places you’ll visit and maybe look for some restaurants (especially if you have food preferences)
- Learn some words of the language (just basic things) and download translation Apps that can help you, here’s a post with the top 20 free travel apps where you can find some
- Travel during low season and shoulder season (this can help a lot as you won’t feel so overwhelmed by the crowds of tourists, especially in big cities like London, Paris, Barcelona, Rome and others). Also try and avoid school holidays
- When planning your attractions visits, avoid rush hours (that’s 9 to 10 AM and 5 to 6ish PM), rather go mid-day when people are at work and the kids in at school
3. Figure out how you’re going to get around
Not knowing how to get around when you arrive in a new place can be so frightening and cause you anxiety as you’ll probably feel super overwhelmed.
So I’d highly recommend looking into how you can get around the city you’re visiting!
PRO TIP: Make sure you check the prices as well. It happened to me a couple of times to pay way more than anticipated on my train and bus tickets, which sent me on a spiral of worrying and feeling anxious that the money I had for the trip wouldn’t be enough. It’s always good to have something extra for these types of situations, and double-check the prices, especially if you’re visiting multiple cities.
Again the best way to search for this is to either read travel blogs, forums or chat to people who have been there. You can also just type on Google, “how to get around X” and you’ll find plenty of results, especially for big cities which usually have an official website for their public transport.
If you’re traveling to a more remote destination, maybe on an island or something like that, look if you have to use boats or/and ferries. And do a lot of research on prices and if you need cash or not as it’s easy to get scammed. Here’s a post on worldwide travel scams that you can read before embarking on a solo trip.
4. Make a bucket list
Getting super excited about all the things that you’ll get to do on your solo trip always helps with the fear and anxiety!
That’s why I recommend making a bucket list with all the amazing that you’ve always dreamed of doing and whenever you feel afraid of traveling alone, you can look at that list and remind yourself of your why:
We have a whole post with the most amazing travel bucket list experiences, but here are a few that I think you might enjoy trying:
- Seeing the Northern Lights
- Going on a gondola ride in Venice
- Eating a crepe while watching the Eiffel Tower sparkle at night
- Relaxing on a beach in the Maldives
5. Prepare before your trip
Now you’ve made your bucket list, I’d recommend preparing for your solo-trip by doing some things in your town that you’ll most likely do while on holiday by yourself.
By doing these things there you’ll get a taste of how it would feel when you’re abroad but here you’ll be in a familiar environment. So it’s kind of like testing the waters and also signaling to your nervous system that it is safe to do these actions alone, and that if you’ve done it there, you can totally do it in a different town.
You’re technically expanding yourself and showing your brain that you’re safe, which is one of our biggest fears!
Here are some of the actions you can take before your trip to prepare:
- Going to dinner or for a coffee date alone in your town
- Go out for a walk alone either in a park or in the central area of your town
- Visit museums/art galleries alone
- Join a free walking tour in your town
6. Reframe you thinking
This is a big one and I found it to be super helpful! Reframing your thinking and even beliefs if we go a bit further than that can help a lot with your fear.
For example, instead of thinking of all the reasons why you should be afraid of taking this solo trip, start thinking about all the reasons to be excited for this amazing adventure!
I know it’s not easy to control your mind but the more you train it, the easier it will be to switch from overthinking about everything that could go wrong to everything that could go right!
Here are some examples of reframing that you could practice before and during your trip:
- I’m going to eat alone in a restaurant → I’m taking myself out on a date
- I can’t visit another country alone → It’s safe for me to visit and discover a new place
- I’ll embarrass myself if I get things wrong → I allow myself to make mistakes and learn from them
7. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes
As I mentioned in the last section, making mistakes is something that we have to get used to whether traveling or not, but especially when we’re on a trip and we get some things wrong.
Right at the beginning of this post I mentioned the universal fears that you can read about in this post and one of them is the fear of ego-death. This primal fear makes us terrified of making mistakes because we’ll feel embarrassed and therefore we’ll feel shame.
Because of this fear we may avoid doing lots of things. But as you probably know, this is not something very healthy and in the long run we might end up regretting all the things that we didn’t do.
This is something that I struggle with a lot and to be honest the only cure I found with it is to keep doing the things that I’m afraid of (even if that means embarrassing myself in front of total strangers).
Some ways in which you can help and soothe yourself is thinking that these are all lessons and that just like every other human you’re learning things along the way! Also most people are too concerned with their own lives, they won’t even notice you making a mistake.
To help put this into perspective, think about how you would react if you saw someone make a mistake. Maybe you’re the kind person who’d immediately offer to help them because you know that’s what you’d like too. Or you’ll think how this is something you’d easily get wrong too if you were them.
This is a super fun exercise that I’m sure will show you that it’s not the end of the world if you make a mistake. And that usually people would want to help you or they might completely understand!
8. Be patient
Patience is a virtue, right?
Especially when you’re traveling to busy places like capital cities where everyone is in a rush to get somewhere!
Having patience to figure things out while on a trip is something that I found so helpful! You can apply this to many situations and trust me you’ll see its benefits.
For example, say you’re someone who gets anxious when there’s a flood of people coming out or into the metro/train/bus. You start following along, hurrying and feeling not safe to be in such a big crowd. Instead of doing that it’s better to stop, wait on the side until the crowd of people is gone and then go about your way.
This is just one thing, but I think you understand the logic of just pausing and being patient when feeling overwhelmed or not safe.
9. Feel your feelings
Something that we don’t get taught enough of the importance of feeling your feelings instead of shutting them down and not processing them.
I think, especially while solo-traveling we should pay attention to what we feel and maybe ask ourselves why we feel the way we do. And when you do that try to always remind yourself, before the fear takes over why you wanted to travel alone to that destination in the first place.
I’d put my why as a reminder on my phone so that I can get a daily alert that will bring me into the present moment.
It’s also important to have self-compassion when feeling your feelings. Sometimes we can judge ourselves so harshly especially if we feel down, sad or afraid to do certain things while on a trip. And it’s important to remember that life isn’t always perfect, while traveling and that the same things that happen to you on a daily basis can happen while in a foreign place too.
10. Join a guided tour/class
This is a great way to meet some new people while you’re traveling alone!
Whether you join a day tour, a walking tour or something like a cooking class, you’re guaranteed that you’ll meet people who are more or less in the same situation as you. Maybe they’re not traveling alone but they’re also in a new place, discovering.
I think especially day tours are great as you can visit nearby places and have everything prepared for you, from transportation to other things. All you’ve got to do is sign up and show up at the right time!
In lots of big cities you can also find free walking tours (check out the GuruWalk site to see if you can find one in your town). These tours are free of charge, although you still have to book your spot (from a website like the one I recommended above).
11. Have your headphones with you
Is anyone leaving their house these days without headphones?
I tend to put them in my bag no matter where I’m going and especially when I’m solo-traveling!
Depending on your preference you can get the noise-canceling ones, which are great for those who want to shut down any background noise and chatter or just the simple ones, through which you can still hear sounds around you. I found that there are people (myself included) who at times, prefer to still hear some noise, for safety. Sometimes I feel like I need to know what’s going on around me.
Headphones are of great help as you can listen to music, play something on your phone while having dinner at a restaurant, or putting them on when you’re taking a taxi and sort of signaling that you’re really up for discussions.
12. Bring books/Kindle
Along with my headphones, I bring my books (or Kindle for those who don’t really like carrying books around the world).
When I travel alone, books are such a life-saver!
Not only do I feel like I have a companion with me, but I also feel like they’re a good distraction for whenever I feel overwhelmed or when I’m alone in a new place and don’t really know what to do.
13. Try journaling
Journaling has honestly helped so much when dealing with difficult situations in my life and I never leave on any trip without a notebook and a pen!
Studies show (check one here) that writing things down on paper can help us emotionally process what we may be going through and I definitely agree with that!
On numerous occasions while I was on a trip I started my mornings at a cafe out in the town with my journal and I felt so much better after that! Plus it feels so cozy when you’re in a cute little local cafe, with your pen and paper, and you’re just writing!
If physical journals aren’t really your thing, you can also get a journaling app on your phone, although I’d recommend the physical one since there’s something about writing down with a pen in hand, it’s totally different than just typing things, for me at least!
14. Write out and recite affirmations
Affirmation work is something that a lot of people do nowadays, and although it may seem a bit weird at first, in time and with practice you’ll definitely notice its effects.
I certainly did in the time that I’ve used affirmations and I noticed that the secret is to keep doing them even when you’re not in the mood. Even if you don’t feel anything when you’re saying them, just the fact that you’re consistent with them will make all the difference.
You can pick some affirmations that you resonate with and write them down in your phone or on paper in your journal!
There are tons of options that you can use, and you can even create them yourself, but if you’re not sure where to begin, here are a couple of affirmations that I really like:
- I’m a safe
- I’m guided
- I am grateful for safe journeys
- I attract positive travel experiences
- Travel opens my mind
- Traveling fills my heart with gratitude
- I am protected
15. Don’t put yourself in unnecessary risk
I think when we’re solo-traveling (and even in daily life), we should always be careful of not putting ourselves in unnecessary risk.
I’m totally for getting out of our comfort zone but we definitely need to take care and not do things that are dangerous!
By the way, we have a whole post on the best countries for solo-female travels, so definitely give it a read if you’re looking for a safe destination where you can travel alone.
Now back to our business! To help you and give you an idea of what you should avoid, I made a short list of things that you should avoid on your solo-travels:
- Destinations that are not safe for solo-traveling
- Streets, areas of your destinations that don’t look safe (research before if there are places/neighborhoods you should avoid in that particular destination)
- Getting an accommodation in an area with a bad reputation just because it’s cheaper
- Getting into a fight/heated discussions with strangers
16. Meditate in the morning to calm your mind
Another trick that I use to calm my nervous system while on a trip is to meditate in the morning or whenever I can and feel called to.
This has changed the experience that I have while on holiday so much. Especially when you’re alone you have days when you wake-up feeling anxious or just like your nervous system is super dysregulated.
There are lots of reasons why things can happen, from merely the fact that you’re in an unfamiliar place to the atmosphere in that particular place or just because you feel lonely.
A few minutes of meditation can help you calm yourself and bring you in a more neutral state where you can observe things around you and be in a state of tranquility.
Regulating our nervous system while we’re traveling, solo or with others is something that we should always strive towards. This means getting back into our bodies, being more present and just feeling safe.
There are tons of great meditation apps out there, and I really like the Triple Flame app, if you want to give it a try. Or you can just go on Youtube or wherever you get your music from and listen to some calming meditative music or hertz.
17. Keep in touch with family and friends
If this is your first time solo-traveling and you’re feeling a bit anxious and afraid I’d highly recommend sharing this with your friends or family members and just ask them if they’d be okay with you calling them while you’re traveling so that you can keep in touch and don’t feel as alone!
I think having someone to talk to, while I was living alone in a new country, helped me so much. Especially in the moments when I was down and I really needed the support.
Leaning in and talking about what you feel with people who know and love you can be so healing.
I’d highly recommend getting an eSIM for international travel so that you have plenty of mobile data, to use Google Maps and video call with your loved ones.
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FAQs about fear of traveling alone
🧳 How to get over your fear of solo travel?
Some of the things I’d recommend are taking baby steps, planning things in advance and getting used to making mistakes.
🤕 Why am I scared to travel?
There are lots of reasons why you feel scared to travel alone, including not feeling safe in unfamiliar environments, feeling lonely (when you’re away from friends and family) and being an introvert.
🤔 What is the fear of traveling alone called?
The medical and official term for the extreme fear of traveling is called hodophobia.
Final thoughts on fear of traveling alone
Already feeling better about going on this adventure alone?
I hope that this post with tips on how to help your fear of traveling alone, gave you a bit of clarity and pointed you towards practical things that you can do
If you have any other tips that you’ve heard about or used during your solo-travels, feel free to drop them below so that everyone can see them and get inspired!
Happy exploring,
Victoria
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